I've noticed throughout life and more recently in my work that it's a common misconception that we are to continue 'being' a certain way.
For example - if I ask a new dream interpretation customer more about their dreams a recurrent answer would be "I never used to dream or remember my dreams".
Or if asking a new coaching client about any symptoms they can describe if they are wanting help with any emotional distresses they may say "I've never suffered with headaches until...", or "I used to be so confident".
My husband and I have often referred to our past selves in the same way about aches and pains or things we once liked to things we didn't and how it's changed.
As I was about to put my music on and get my Beyonce on this morning, I realised I hadn't always been a 'die-hard' fan of hers - this got my head thinking "how did I motivate myself before my love of Beyoncé started?!" But most of all - did this make me a lesser fan! In all honesty I didn't worry too much about that specific situation but it did get the cogs whirring in my head about change.
As the wheel of fortune in Tarot dictates - change is the only certainty in life - but yet we fight it so much! We attach ourselves so solidly to past and even current versions of ourselves that we struggle to see all the ways we have improved over time. We also fail to see that what we are in each moment is what we need to be in that very moment.
How many times do you say "I never used to get headaches" "I've never been a fan of.." and although this is a fact, it's an outdated one of the old version of you. As children we often turned up our noses to vegetables and fresh food yet as adults we realise the importance and deliciousness of these foods. There are many aspects to why we do this - as children our taste buds are much more sensitive and therefore bitter tasting fruits or vegetables can leave a 'sour taste' and we group all food types as similar, yet sweet treats are also amplified and so we crave more. There is also the control aspect of it that we want what we can't have and therefore when we get the freedom to eat what we want we choose to eat either fresh food or binge on sweet stuff.
Some people are great at trying new things whereas others have quite a strong belief of who they are and what they think makes them, well them. People can get so confined to their likes and dislikes from earlier in life that they struggle to try new things.
My husband has been using the NLP techniques he has mastered with me lately and something he said really made me think...he asked me who I was...I said confidently "A mother"...he replied "that's not who you are, who are you? What kind of person are you?" It took me a while and we soon uncovered many deep rooted insecurities from past versions of myself that I have held on to to define the current version of myself. I have been lied to and I have lied but the version of me now finds it impossible to lie and difficult to be lied to. The past me was led to believe trust was a mythical word reserved for precious few and I in turn became untrustworthy. Past versions of myself drank heavily and took drugs to numb pain because I was hurt in so many ways by so many people both physically and mentally, but today I see with clarity and face my trials empowered.
You see those versions of me are not who I am now. I have changed. But they do help me in my life today to feel empowered, unbeatable and pretty damn incredible to have survived some of the things I have. The varied characteristics we embody throughout our life teach us things and allow us to see how and where we want to grow. They are not to be ashamed of, they are to be forgiven.
So Yes, I am the same person, I experienced those things and felt those feelings but I don't anymore. I have learnt from my mistakes, I have grown and empowered myself through my pain. I don't enjoy alcohol anymore, for no other reason than it doesn't make me feel good. I like sprouts now, but as a child I would spit them out. We change. Every day, every month, every year. We have the opportunity to learn something about ourselves each day that we never knew, like a gift that can be unwrapped each day we wake up. So next time you say "I don't like...try it again, you may just love it!" Next time you feel an ache for the first time, realise that this part of you needs a little extra tlc right now as it has worked so effortlessly for many years. You don't need to fear change. Change is what teaches us new things. Change is what makes each day different from the one before. Change is guaranteed so embrace it.